Don’t hide your fear!
A few weeks ago, I was chatting with a friend about all things life, motherhood, God, and career. The conversation was stimulating as I have always found my friend to be confident and comfortable in her own skin. Then she dropped a light bombshell—she still feels insecure when performing an assignment or speaking to any number of group of people.
Why was it light? Because I mean, everyone feels a little out of it once in a while, no big deal, right? But this was a bombshell because I always saw this amazing lady as competent and highly capable. I still think she is, despite her confession of feeling inferior at the most inopportune times.
I have had my fair share of insecurities. I wallowed in them for years on end with no knowledge about how to handle it. Help did come but not without a lot of mistakes and frustrations along the way.
So, let’s talk about the elephant in the room. I asked you not to hide your fear, and I know you’re probably wondering what I mean by that. Should you let everyone know how fearful you are? Should you wear your uncertainty and insecurities on your face? No, of course not.
You see we spend a lot of time trying to prove to others that we’ve got it together even when we don’t. We wear our best clothes, try to look for the best way to impress others with our wit and intelligence so that they don’t catch a glimpse of the slight tremor in our voice. So much energy and focus go into trying to look the part.
What if we stopped trying to be perfect and just focus on what needs to be done?
My friend told me how much she loved to serve. Helping others, ministering to their needs and just being available were her greatest strengths and what brought her the most joy. She didn’t think there was more to her, so she desperately wanted to stick with what she knew best. But I believe God was calling her to more. And the more she rose up to the challenge by simply using her heart, the more she projected love, joy, and competence. The rest of us saw nothing but the strength and wisdom that she so graciously exuded. And she wasn’t inauthentic about it.
So maybe it’s time you stop trying so hard to hide your fears and insecurities. Maybe it’s time to use what comes naturally and make everything else shine.
If you’re nervous about that presentation at work, relax. Focus on what you really want to give—knowledge that will bring results? Genuine interest in helping your clients succeed?
If you’re tempted to compare your slow pace to others, look at the bigger picture through the lens of the small details; the lessons you’re learning are helping you build a stronger foundation.
Everybody has insecurities. Nothing new there. So stop trying to hide your fear, instead, project your heart and all things will fall into place.
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